


Not that kind of Compromised

by MidnightWolfy



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-11
Updated: 2014-01-11
Packaged: 2018-01-08 07:23:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1129907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightWolfy/pseuds/MidnightWolfy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint reflects on his life being HIV positive and how it will effect him and his future relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not that kind of Compromised

**Author's Note:**

> A prompt fill for the Avengers Kink meme. http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/16524.html?thread=36311436#t36311436

It was well known that Clint's past was spotty at best. Being raised in a circus wasn't the healthiest of scenarios but Clint had to take what he could get. When he was younger he often blamed the circus for what happened but now when he looks back he understands that it was ignorance. Ignorance on the circus's part, they were happy to welcome any potential mark into the big top regardless of ,well, anything really and ignorance on Clint's part. He was young and cocky and thought that he was invincible! It didn't help that he had never heard of HIV or AIDS until he was diagnosed upon his recruitment to SHIELD.

Not to say that a customer that was HIV positive shouldn't have been allowed in but Clint had been bitter for the first years after being diagnosed. He often wondered why these people were allowed to be in public. Why were they allowed to put other people in danger so openly? Then as years went by and his knowledge and self-hate both grew and diminished respectively he stopped referring to the HIV community as THEY and started referring to it as WE.

As with all things knowledge involved facing truths. The truth that he would be HIV positive for the rest of his life. The truth that he could never be anything more than a sniper because SHIELD couldn't knowingly put potential marks at risk. "Leave the spy business to the Widow," Fury had said but Clint knew that the decision was made because they couldn't put anyone at risk especially himself. Compromised immune systems sucked was also one of the truths he had to face. His least favorite truth was also the hardest to bare.

Clint had been ignorant. He had been a sickly teenager but he had worked through it for his love of archery for the perception of owing the circus. Although, his act wasn't hands on it got him lot of attentions from his fans. Young girls and guys that thought he looked amazing in the spotlights, that thought he was handsome, that wanted to spend one spontaneous night behind the animal tent under the stars with him. Clint hadn't bothered to count his conquests much less bother to remember names. He didn't know when he contracted HIV and the worst part was knowing that he may have passed it on to countless numbers of young men and women.

This truth, the worst one he had to face was what lead him to make the decision to never put anyone at risk again. Clint had marked the date, March 8, 2000 was when he gave up any and all sexual activities excluding kissing but only if he hadn't gotten a busted lip during a mission or that one time in Budapest where he had lost three teeth, thank you SHIELD dental plan. He couldn't and wouldn't ruin anyone else's lives because of his base desires.

So, when Fury had mentioned the Avengers Initiative Clint had been skeptical. Being on a team generally meant fighting next to them. Wounds were likely, even expected and, of course, Clint had his doubts. It wasn't common knowledge in SHIELD, in fact with the exception of Natasha no one but his superiors knew that Clint was HIV positive and he'd like to keep it that way. Fury had persisted, "the team needs a sniper, an out of the box thinker as it were. Someone to look at the problem from a distance." Clint assured him that he would consider it but Loki hadn't given him a choice.

The team was awesome, Clint decided. It was nice to know that he had people he could trust and that trusted him. There was just one issue. Since the impromptu assembling of the Avengers, no one save Tony got the jist of any of the other team members including the small fact that Clint was immune compromised. Actually, he thinks Tony hadn't gotten that memo either because he wasn't common knowledge and they all knew how Tony handled secrets.

Which brings up Clint's newest truth. He finds himself falling for one of his teammates and falling hard. Bruce was a wonderful scientist and after getting past the shy exterior he was a wonderful person. Clint appreciated his deadpan humor and his down to earth attitude. Plus, he got along great with the hulk which was just a bonus as far as Clint was concerned. Hulk was funny and wonderful in a whole other way than Bruce was which suited Clint just fine. Both sides of Bruce's coin were sweet, caring and surprisingly, especially in the Hulk's case, gentle. Catching Hulk cuddling a small stray kitten after a battle had Clint's heart melting.

This brought doubts to Clint's mind. Could Bruce contract HIV? What would happen to the Hulk then? Would the gamma radiation poisoning effect Clint's health with long term secondary exposure? Could he actively pursue a chaste relationship with a person who he wanted to be intimate with? How would his teammates react? Could he explain HIV to Thor? Was HIV around in Cap's time? The questions and maybes continued on and on until his worry started affecting his sleep schedule which affected his overall wellbeing and despite the shot, Clint ended up catching the flu.

The first thing he had done was make an appointment with SHIELD medical. They had started him on antibiotics and taken him off of active duty. The second thing Clint did was call Coulson. Coulson had long been one of the biggest grounding factors in Clint's life. He was reliable and loyal to a fault. He never flinched when Clint was near or withdrew from a handshake. He never once treated Clint like he had the plague or that he would spread it by breathing. Coulson understood and he would know what to say to make the situation easier.

Coulson had suggested telling the Team. They would know something was going on when Clint was taken off active duty. They would ask questions that he should have answered months ago when the team was formed. Clint begrudgingly agreed. He would tell his team and his potential partner but on his own time. With those thoughts in mind Clint got off the phone with Coulson and promptly hid in his apartment for two days.

His apartment was spotless but Clint found he couldn't stop cleaning. He always got this way when he got sick. Clean, clean, clean, disinfect, disinfect, disinfect. Got to prevent those opportunistic infections. Clean, clean, clean. The mantra kept him from thinking of what was really bothering him. How was he going to tell his team? What would they think? What would Bruce think? Could Hulk understand what immune compromised was? Clean, clean, clean, disinfect, disinfect, disinfect.

Natasha found him exactly on the 48 hour mark with a Clorox wipe in his hand going over every door knob in his apartment. Although he was encased in two sweatshirts, a scarf, a beanie, woolen socks and a pair of gloves, he was shivering. Shaking her head but silent Natasha took the Clorox wipes from his trembling hand and lead him to his bedroom where she laid him down and covered him in his bed and only when he was settled, half dozing really, did she speak, "I cannot pretend to know what you are going through, Това́рищ, but you must rest. You will not heal if you do not let your body rest. Do not worry about the others they will understand and do not worry about Bruce. If anyone can sympathize with you he can. Now sleep my Това́рищ, I will keep watch while you rest." With Natasha keeping watch Clint let his mind rest.

The next day, Clint was still tired and still sick but he was determined to stop being a coward and tell his team the truth. So he walked into the common room, two sweaters and all, and stepped in front of the huge flat screen, blocking House, with Tony protesting loudly. With every Avenger's full attention directed at him, Clint felt his self-confidence plummet. Two seconds away from making a bad joke he caught Bruce's eyes. Curiosity was the forefront but Clint caught worry and concern bleeding through his chocolate orbs, a hint of green told him that Hulk was present and willing to step in to protect his cupid. Clenching his fist, Clint cleared his scratchy throat and blurted, "I have HIV."

"That's old news, feather head," Tony said, "Now move your snotty flu carrying ass out of the way, House was just proving his lackeys wrong, again."

"Wait, you knew?" Clint demanded, "How long have you known?"

"Since you were spirited away by Loki's magic stick," Tony replied, "Now move Katness."

"Indeed, Shield brother, we have been informed of your illness and hold you no ill will. You are a mighty warrior and have proven yourself to be an asset in many a fine battle!" Thor bellowed in what served as his indoor voice.

Clint was shocked, not only had they known but they had treated him no different from anyone else on the team. Looking from Thor to Steve, he saw nothing but understanding and compassion in the super soldier's eyes. It was easy to forget that he was once a frail sickly kid from Brooklyn who wanted nothing more than to stop bullying. Natasha looked smug from her perch on the arm of the loveseat. Finally, still nervous, Clint met Bruce's eyes. They still had the same curiosity and worry from before but the brown was almost overtaken by the green.

Bruce made to leave the common room and beckoned Clint to follow him. Once they were safely in what was dubbed the Big Kitchen Bruce busied himself making tea. Clint nervously perched on a barstool near the island and waited. Tea done Bruce settled a cup in front of the still shivering Clint and plopped down in his own barstool.

"You didn't know they had briefed us on your condition." It wasn't a question so Clint wrapped his hands around the warm tea and cuddled it close to his chest. "You thought I wouldn't accept you for having a condition that was out of your control." Again it wasn't a question.

"I didn't know what to think."

"I just wish you would have talked to me about this."

"Oh yeah, that would have been great. Hey Bruce I kind of think I'm in love with you but I'm HIV positive from having unprotected sex with a stranger, so how do you feel about dating?"

"It would have been better than you distancing yourself from me. From everyone. You don't think we haven't noticed, Clint? The way you have been requesting missions and skipping team training to shoot at the range for hours at a time? It's a wonder you hadn't gotten sick weeks ago!"

"It's not like anyone told me that they were briefing my team on my condition! Who even knows how many other agents know! I think, I missed the all your medical history will be on display memo!"

"God Clint, it's nothing like that. We weren't keeping it from you, we thought you knew that we knew!"

"Well obviously I didn't!"

"I see that now. It's the worrying that got you sick, isn't it? I know it must be hard. It's not like I wanted to come out and tell everyone that I'm a giant green rage monster, either, but it was all over the internet and the news so I didn't have a choice. I wished you had a choice and I know, now, that this entire situation was handled poorly and Fury will be hearing about this," Bruce's eyes had lost most of their green hue. Chocolate overtaking mint in a swirl that had Clint thinking about ice cream and if Bruce would taste as sweet. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Bruce continued, oblivious to Clint's distraction, "I care about you Clint and if you feel comfortable about this then I'd really like to date you."

"W-what?" Clint stuttered out, surprised.

"Listen Clint, I turn into a giant green rage monster that no one knows how to kill, I'm really not afraid of HIV."

"I'm still not going to risk spreading it, invincible two ton green alter egos aside."

"I can respect that. I've pretty much given up finding a safe way to have sex and keep my heart rate down at the same time, anyway."

"What? You can't have sex?"

"Not without Hulking out, they didn't brief you on the heart rate thing?"

"I guess, they thought it wasn't relevant to me..."

"Ok, we are really going to have a talk with Fury about his briefing staff. Not only was it against HIPPA to brief the team on your medical status without your express permission, I gave very clear instructions about giving full disclosure to all my teammates on the known signs that I get before hulking out," Bruce ranted, his eyes a mint chocolate swirl that was quickly becoming Clint's favorite thing to watch. So captivated before Clint knew what he was doing his lips were pressed to Bruce's.

With a purring growl, Bruce wrapping his hands around Clint's head, returning the kiss enthusiastically. Breaking the kiss with a gasp, Clint pulled back, his blue eye's meeting Bruce's bi-colored swirl. Bruce grinned, "So does this mean you're willing to try?"

"Definitely."

"Hey, Hawkass! Don't be giving Bruce the flu, I need him for sci-OW!" Tony was interrupted by Natasha smacking him upside the head. Clint's chuckle ended in a wheezing couch that had Bruce ushering the archer back to his room. With his favorite Doctor keeping watch and his mind at ease, Clint slept peacefully.


End file.
